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How Do You Tell Your Story? My Insights on Storytelling

James Warren March 14, 2018
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As the founder of storytelling platform Share More Stories (SMS), a large part of my existence focuses on encouraging people, communities and organizations to engage in storytelling. This isn’t hard for me to do because even before I founded  Share More Stories, I was a firm believer in the power of stories and how they enrich our lives. After leaving my corporate job in pursuit of a new purpose – to improve human self-expression and connection through story –  I am heartened to see how many other people recognize how essential storytelling is. It’s certainly a hot topic at the moment, with key influencers, marketing managers, writers and even scientists promoting the practice, and there’s a good reason why: storytelling is still one of the best ways we can convey crucial information about ourselves, and our world, to one another.

Think about those times when you are introduced to somebody new, whether it be in a professional or social setting. How do you convey information about yourself to reveal who you really are? For anyone that’s ever met me, there are usually a few key elements that categorize who I am on the surface. I am a father, a CEO, a former New Yorker and a lover of stories. But dig a little deeper, or rather, let me share my stories with you, and you will understand who I really am. I often say that you are your stories, and it’s true. Because without knowing my experiences with 9/11, why spending time with my family is so important, or how pivotal trains are to my life, you don’t really know me.

The same goes for brands and organizations, too. We now exist in a customer-centric world, where the goal is no longer just to sell, but also to truly connect and create meaningful relationships with customers, as well as with employees and communities. It’s no longer enough to know the basics; demographics, job titles, and key interests are great, but they don’t necessarily provide the deeper insight into what we all truly think, believe, and feel. To uncover this, we need to know everybody’s stories. We need to hear everybody’s unique perspective about the experiences that have shaped their lives, not just for the benefit of the companies we do business with, but for ourselves, too.

So I am pretty sure I can guess what you’re thinking now: that’s great, but how do I actually do it? How do I share my story? Thankfully, another key part of my existence is enabling people to reach their potential. Everybody has a story inside of them, which means, that we all have the potential to share it. And with that, I would like to share my own insights into the most important elements of sharing your story.

Authenticity

Another concept that has been increasing in popularity of late is authenticity, but when we refer to it, we aren’t just talking about being honest and open. It goes a lot deeper than that; it requires you to really reflect on your past. Think about how you got to where you are now — what are the key experiences that define who you are? A Share More Stories contributor who identifies herself as “not a writer” demonstrates this level of authenticity perfectly in her story A Baby From A Baby. The contributor highlights those key moments that were pivotal to her being, moments that were scary and confusing yet full of wonder and joy.

In my own story, Go Love, Young Man, I share my personal experience with an Erykah Badu album. This story is not only about the music; it’s about meeting the love of my life, my wife, and the journey we have shared together. It was that album, that experience, that helped to define the relationship and wonderful journey I was about to embark on, yet I only knew that from deep reflection. That’s what we mean by authenticity.

Courage

I get it – sharing a story can be daunting. You are uncovering truths about yourself and the experiences you have been through but without a clear understanding of why it’s so important to you. Still, and this is perhaps one of the things I love most about stories, by sharing your story you are facing your greatest challenges head-on. As I like to say, don’t be defined by your fears, face them!

The key here is to be vulnerable, and I can say from experience that this definitely isn’t a bad thing. One of my most vulnerable stories, The Moments highlights the impact of my father’s life and death, all of the moments he was there, and all the moments he wasn’t. It required a lot from me to really open up and put myself out there, but it was worth it. It revealed a truth, based on the experiences of my life. Another example of courageous storytelling is from another Share More Stories contributor who detailed her struggle with chronic illness. In Sidelined: a perspective of living with Crohn’s Disease, our contributor faces up to her own fears of the disease, and in doing so, exposes her long-concealed trepidation. In reading stories like this on the site, you will come to realize how vital courage is to telling your story.

Curiosity

Finally, there has to be a reason why you share your story, and the biggest reason to do so is to learn from it. The way to learn? Be curious. Sometimes when we are in the midst of our experience, we struggle to understand the reason for it, or we simply aren’t ready to acknowledge it. Yet in reflecting and sharing our story, we often uncover truths that take on significant meaning and guide us as we continue our journey through life. In the time-transcending An Only Child’s Perspective, our contributor uses her courage to outline her journey in an incredibly authentic way, probing further to discover why certain childhood events left such a lasting impression. In fact, this contributor’s curiosity even leads her to identify other stories that need to be told. It truly is an enlightening perspective and a great example of why, when you uncover something that ‘sticks’ in your memory, it’s essential to dig a little deeper in order to elicit meaning from it.

I also encourage curiosity as means to connect with one another, as this also further fuels our learning. In the early days of setting up Share More Stories, I wrote Breaking Through Is Hard. In exploring the difficulties of founding a startup, I was able to understand why I found it so challenging and realized my previous career with one of the biggest brands in the world was impacting my present entrepreneurial journey. In writing this and in being extremely curious, I was able to connect with other entrepreneurs and learn with them, whether they had similar experiences or not.  

Authenticity + Courage + Curiosity = Your Story

As a lover of storytelling and a firm believer in personal journeys, I’ve shared an abundance of stories and worked with countless others to share their stories with the world. Through my experience I can say that the most important thing in all of this is to get your stories out there, because they are needed. They are needed to foster deeper connections and for more meaningful relationships, with organizations, with customers, with employees, with communities, with each other, and, most importantly, with ourselves. I know that the most powerful stories are those that are unique and can only be told by you, because you are the only one who had that experience. So if you are unsure where to start, or how to tell your story, remember this: Be Authentic. Be Courageous. Be Curious. It’s all anyone can ask. Because without you, your stories wouldn’t exist, and without your stories, we wouldn’t really understand who you truly are.

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